Someone once asked me why I retired so young...
Without going into detail which could cause a lawsuit should a parent read this, I was injured by a student very badly that could have resulted in expulsion, but didn't. I was on the ground and luckily had a teacher witness the incident. I took a very bad blow to the neck. At the time, I was unaware of how badly I was injured. I do not know if I hit my head or not...but I do know that the blow to the neck caused me to form fluid in my brain behind my inner ear....and after much research and testing...I had migraines and vertigo so bad that I could not get out of bed in the morning without falling on the floor. I crawled around a lot in those earlier days. Medications have not helped in draining the fluid....and shunts would be too close to the bundle of nerves that include the optic, hearing, taste, and smell. So, I went for several years where I couldn't keep track of time....I would miss appointments. I couldn't stand up without teetering. People would look at me while I was in the stores and think that I was drunk. But, I am much better now....but still burned out on kids...and I hate feeling that way. I keep a healthy distance from all children. I am not sure when that happened...a year or two after I retired from teaching...but I do feel that way. I am not proud of this feeling since kids were always my whole life. But they told me that I suffered some brain damage and that these feelings will sometimes happen...but that it might pass over time...and that has been the case. I can now be around children, but choose not to teach them anymore. So, that is what happened in another nutshell...which must be a big one because of all of these paragraphs...LOL. But, I do miss teaching.
On
the day that I quit my job (I had a vertigo-free day), I decided to
take a walk in the neighborhood. I can remembering going down the block
when suddenly, this bubble ebbed up from my spirit and I stood there
standing in front of someone's house, bawling uncontrollably. It was
then that I realized, that upon quitting my job, a part
of me had died...and I was in mourning. I had defined myself as Vicki
Kee, teacher of the hearing impaired...instead of Vicki Kee, the
person. It is funny how we can do that to ourselves in order to have
purpose in life...and I was single and that was my purpose...a calling
from God...which is an entirely different story. I loved what I did. I
even loved working with violent kids. In most cases, their behaviors
would change once they were able to communicate their needs. But, I
came across one child who did not change. This child needed medications
to control her behavior. This child's mother actually apologized to me
that she hadn't allowed the meds to be administered prior to my
accident. This child's adrenaline would escalate uncontrollably when
this child's wants (not needs) were not met. The school's response to
this was to send me to classes for self defense for teachers....and none
of the moves that I learned could legally be used with a child of this
height. The school was at a loss as to what to do. My principal kept
having me research alternative schools for the child. The parents
weren't interested. But, that is my story.
BTW....the story has a happy ending. This child is now in high school and with medication, performs to expectations. This beautiful child has a chance to blend into what we call a "normal" society. God bless that child.
Tags: retired teacher injury